to the meninists out there

Dear meninists,

I won’t ask you why men make more than women. You’re so predictable, I know you’ll say something along the lines of “they choose lesser paying jobs” or “they don’t.”

Really, Ryan? And why do you think women choose lesser paying jobs? It must be a genetic trait, right? Just like how our DNA makes us like romantic comedies and flowers.

But anyways, I didn’t ask you that. However, I know that even though I didn’t ask you, there’s a 90 percent chance you’ll tell me because you think I always care what you have to say. As a man, your opinion matters.

To that you’ll say “you’re making generalizations about men! Men have issues too! Men though!”

Just because I acknowledge that men have privileges that women do not have doesn’t mean I think being a man is one big, fun party that I wish I would’ve been invited to. I know that men have issues too, but there are certain privileges that men have just by being men. Yes, other factors come into play, but they don’t erase the inequalities women face for simply being women.

“You’re playing the victim,” you’ll say any time I point out something that’s unequal.

You’re right, meninist. Women have no issues. We’re just so inherently dramatic and emotional that we create all of these problems for enjoyment. Why would we be successful business people (notice how “businessman” is the phrase we commonly use in our language? Couldn’t possibly be the result of sexism or gender roles or anything) or badass journalists when we could be victims? Why would we write comics with female heroes when they could be saved by men instead?

You either won’t understand my sarcasm and agree with me, or you’ll call me a radical, stereotypical feminist. You’ll say “women are equal.”

And the fact that you feel the need to explain the experience of being a woman to me shows that feminism is still necessary.

The fact that when I share my opinion, you’ll call be a bitch or a whore, you’ll call me ugly or hot, shows that feminism is still necessary.

You can’t disprove feminism by critiquing my appearance when I’m trying to talk about issues.

You can’t disprove feminism by explaining feminism to me.

You can’t disprove feminism by telling me that women choose to stay at home or choose to be the victim when I can turn on my TV and hear men talk about what women should or shouldn’t be able to do.

“If you believed in equality, you’d be advocating for both women and men,” you’ll say.

But I do. You must not have heard that part when you were talking over me or sending aggressive messages on Tinder.